As If We Never Said Goodbye

I'm writing to you now from backstage at the third performance here at Western of William Inge's Picnic. I'm a little confused at the moment. I thought I hated theater,then opening night happened and this euphoria of bliss came over the cast. I started to remember what that felt like. People being so happy and excited and full of bliss and I started to feel it too. We didn't get a big crowd that night, but it couldn't stop that opening night high. Though I was only member of the crew, I too was seemed to be in that state of bliss, which helped me realize, I'm not meant to work backstage. I don't know if I will ever act professionally, but I'm not done with the stage. I could feel what I loved about the theater again. It was as if none of the bad stuff I went through in my last play two years ago ever happened. I went to the director after the show, blissfully happy, hugged her and said, "thank you for giving me my life back." She then thanked me for being part of the show. I walked out of the theater, tossed my head back and laughed. I laughed so hard I fell over. Theater destroyed me two years ago, but now it's brought me back to life. I'm not sure what to do now, but I know for a fact that for the first time since I got here, I am happy. Honest to goodness happy.