Uncertainty is the driving force behind all great events. It forces people to question all sorts of things and when they test that curiosity they discover magnificent things that change both their lives and lives of people around the world. Mother Theresa wondered what would happen if she left her convent to help the poor and unfortunate, Thomas Edison wondered if there was a better way to harness electricity for light, Nelson Mandela wondered if the apartheid in South Africa could one day be illegal, and many others were all fueled by their curiosity and let uncertainty of what good or bad may happen, be a driving force for them to achieve their dreams.
So what does this have to do with me? You've all heard me talk about how much theater and the arts has caused me pain and how I have no desire to do it anymore. Everyday I'm in my theater classes, I feel the worst pain as I become engulfed in flash backs to the last time I was in theater. Its been a year and a half and I still can't let go of the pain. Every fiber of my being wants to quit and do something completely different that won't hurt so badly. But then I feel that if I leave I will always wonder what could have been if I stayed. My uncertainty has brought me to a crossroad and its ripping my heart down the middle.
I wondered about the same things when I left theater.
ReplyDeleteBut I don't think about it anymore.
I'm much happier.
You can still do plays in your spare time later on in life if you still want to, but theater doesn't have to be your LIFE!